Well, autumn is starting to hit Seattle, so I need to buy a new coat. I don’t buy a new winter coat every year. Once I fall for a great coat, I wear it for ages. However, I keep going up and down in size according to all kinds of variables outside my control. So, I’m looking for a new coat.
I love shopping online. Just like many of you, I find it much easier to shop from home in my nightgown than to run around town. Also, I live in an area with very conservative, boring stores. So, here I am, just like you, browsing online for something to wear. I love the internet.
What Size Do You Wear?
That is the million-dollar question. Every fashion company calls a size 14 something different. Actually, I fall in between missy and plus sizes, but I think I might be a plus again. My tip: Unless you are certain about your size (while cognizant of the fact that five different factories in China seem to make the same garment five different ways), order the size you think you are and order it one size up or one size down. Most decent companies will include an easy return label, so you just peel the paper off, slap the label on the box, and toss the box at the guy in your local mailbox store.
However, the big problem with buying coats online is that they are not as stretchy as most things you buy online. Still, I think it’s worth dealing with returns because I find better inventory on the internet.
What Style Is Best For Plus-Size Coats?
Online writers who tell you that you must wear single-breasted, princess-seamed, A-line coats and avoid all trench coats are telling you what looks good on them. But, all women, especially all heavy women, carry their weight in different places. I love to say that there is only one shape for skinny but there are many ways to be fat. (Sorry for using the F word.)
Pear Shapes: I am not a pear shape, but it makes sense for you to look for a belted coat or any style that accents your waist. If the coat hits you in the right places, you may be able to balance your hips and tush with extra buttons, epaulets, wide collars, puff sleeves, and anything else up top. The most important thing for you is to check out how the coat fits your tush when you sit and stand up. Ladies, I have seen the President’s wife up close before she had couturiers. She is beautiful, has a fabulous smile, and is all muscle; but the main thing I remember is that her dress (and zipper) rode up on her butt when she stood. (Enough cattiness.)
Apple Shapes: If your body is like mine, you don’t want huge collars, toggles, weird shoulders, or any bodice detailing that makes you look top-heavy. There are exceptions. If a coat fits me perfectly and comes in a gorgeous jewel tone, I am able to manage toggle buttons if I wear the coat with black leggings and black high-heeled boots (to make me look like I am skinny underneath). You can use the same trick with a trench. (Try tying the buckle belt on the side or in back.) I prefer 3/4 length (midi) coats if I’m in the city and hip-length coats when I’m in the burbs (in my car). Generally, you will look best in long V-necklines (to lengthen your neck and torso), narrow-to-medium lapels, and single or hidden buttons. But, don’t get tiny details that look cutesy on your big frame.
Hourglass figures: Anything with a great fit looks good on you. A coat with a belt, like a wrap coat, will make the most of your tiny waist and curves. You can usually wear a short jean jacket or leather jacket. My best tip for you is to make sure the buttons on your chest don’t gape open.
What’s in Style for Fall-Winter 2011-2012?
Well, I could go through US fashion magazines and tell you what I see, but you can do that for yourself. Instead, I will tell you what is being hyped in London – the clothes that will actually be in UK stores. London winter fashion seems to drift over to mainstream America. No, don’t dress like the Queen and don’t dress in country riding clothes unless you are tall or you ride. I’m thinking of styles that are trendy enough to make the FW 2012 adverts, but not so trendy that you need to pierce your eyebrow and hang out in that square with the lion statues. Here is my take on the UK press releases:
- Faux Fur, Faux Sheepskin, Faux Fur Collars: I’m not big on faux anything, so I want you to wear good faux fur that isn’t spikey.
- Duffle Coats With Toggle Buttons: Duffles are usually hip-length and similar in shape to a double-breasted pea coat. (See above.)
- Quilted Jackets: Be very careful about quilted and puffy things. You don’t want to become a marshmallow.
- Military Blazers and Coats: Subtle military details are cute if you find the right cut and you don’t look top-heavy.
- Funnel Collars: They’re showing lots of cowl-style collars. These make fat necks look short, although I love the Mycra-Pac Scrunch-Neck raincoat.
- Plaid Jackets and Car-Coats: Most large women look hideous in plaid. Plaid might look good if you are tall or the pattern is dark.
- Capes: Capes make short women look like hobbits.
- Jewel Tones: If you can find a great-fitting cobalt, red, or fuchsia coat buy it and wear it with all black. Jewel tones are fabulous and will make you happy.
- Macs AKA Trench Coats: Many have bows, frills, or piping. No snake trenches unless you live in LV.
- Brocade: I hope to never wear brocade.
- Long Belted Midi Coats: These make you look taller and thinner. Long coats mustn’t be too long, too short, too tight, or too voluminous, especially on large women.
Fabulous wool coats are a huge investment, so take your time. If you can’t find the right coat that can be perfected by a great tailor, just get something inexpensive for now and wait for the winter sales.
Christina Gregoire - Christina Gregoire writes about divorce, fashion, and baby boomers. Her forte is explaining complex ideas in simple language.
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